Words From a Wicked Woman

I honestly did try. Really. I just can’t make my body do what my mind would like. I need spine surgery to remove two cysts and fuse two vertebrae. Without that surgery I am in ever-increasing pain. I felt good enough for a few days to believe that I’d feel the same until I could get into an operating room. I was wrong. In the weeks since my last post, I have lost almost all ability to walk. Certainly, I’ve lost any ability to be pain-free without laying down. There is no way I can clear my head enough to write cogently on any topic at all even if I have very definite opinions about what’s going on in the world.

I was originally scheduled for surgery November 2. However, I learned earlier this week that my beloved, adored, symbiotically-attached-at-the-hip Airedale Terrier probably has liver cancer. “Probably” because we don’t know for sure and won’t find out until at least November 1. It’s possible she only has Cushing’s disease, which is bad enough, but also treatable. I can’t have surgery that will leave me out of the house for at least two weeks when I don’t know how much time I’ll have with her. The thought of her living her last days without me, and me without her, is far more painful than anything that could be going on with my spine. And so, for Lola and for myself, I’ve postponed my surgery. It is tentatively re-scheduled for the end of November, but I may have to put it off again depending on Lola’s test results.

Given this unfortunate turn of events, I deeply regret to announce that Words From a Wicked Woman will close until at least January and possibly February. I need to focus all of my energies on Lola’s health and my own. I have no doubt, however, that I will be back. Until then, I hope that you all have love and wonder in your lives.

Technorati Tags: blogging

It’s been almost three months since my last post and that one was on one of my more periphery topics–Apple Computer. It’s been even longer since I’ve been able to bring readers news and comment on LGBT, POC or religious issues. I have truly missed doing so, however, I have been very busy taking care of my health. I learned in May that I’d contracted reactive arthritis. It is a type of arthritis that can develop due to an infection in another part of the body. In this case, it was traced to an earlier sinus infection. At around the same time, I began to have difficulty with another part of my body that drained me of any energy that wasn’t already being drained due to fibromyalgia and back and leg pain. All of these conditions are still present, although it seems as though the reactive arthritis has abated.

Last month I learned that the pain I’ve had in my back and leg since early 2006 is due to something called a synovial cyst that is sitting on my spinal cord. In fact, there are two of them, one on each side of the cord. The pain has been such that I haven’t been able to get out in the world and the pain medication tended to leave me a bit on the foggy side. Therefore, I’ve been completely unable to write. After attempting an alternative to the fairly heavy medication I’ve been on, it seems that my only real relief will come from spinal surgery that I will have on November 2. This surgery will fuse my spine to keep the cysts from returning in the future. However, spinal surgery is a serious business. It involves a great deal of pain and quite a lot of rehabilitation. The fusion itself will take a year or more to heal completely and it is probably safe to say that I will spend a great deal of time in bed in the beginning of that process. It occurs to me that I may be able to write then if my pain is controlled.

For reasons that are completely unknown to me, even though I’ve switched to stronger pain medication, the fog I’ve been under seems to have lifted somewhat and enabled my brain to function more normally. It was never my intent to abandon this blog and it is my wish to continue writing leading up to my spinal surgery. However, it is safe to say that the content of the blog may change a bit. While I will continue to write on subjects similar to those of the past, I will do so from a more personal perspective. Everyone and her brother has an opinion on their subject(s) of choice. Words From a Wicked Woman has tended more toward passing along information with, perhaps, a smattering of opinion as opposed to 500 to 800 words of opinionated prose. What I’d like to do now is take a more balanced approach by presenting opinion based on research and observation, thereby providing readers with a more informed view of what I think.

When all is said and done, I am a journalist. Theoretically, journalism is supposed to be unbiased. In truth, it rarely is. That does not mean journalism is unfair as long as both sides are presented. Think MSNBC versus Fox News. One tends to lean to the political Left and the other way over to the political Right. Forget for the moment that only one is a “real” news organization and pretend that they are both equally respected. If both news organizations present each side of a controversial topic, then it is appropriate to say that both are fair in their coverage, even though they each have a different perspective. Just think of me as the darker-skinned, ovarially-gifted, somewhat humor-challenged version of Keith Olbermann, host of MSNBC’s Countdown. Olbermann never fails to deliver the news, but he does so with thought-provoking, often sarcastic, informed commentary. More often than not, he is right on the mark–in my opinion.

It is my wish to get back to doing that which I love: writing and researching. Ah, but if wishes were horses I’d have a whole stable of jumpers. Hmm, perhaps it’s time for me to get out my jodhpurs.

Technorati Tags: blogging, health